Harriette Cole: My kids are starting to notice their cousins get treated better

DEAR HARRIETTE My parents are playing favorites with their grandchildren and it s becoming more obvious Related Articles Harriette Cole How can I tell my uncle he s damaging his kid Harriette Cole She wants a job with my company but I ve heard about her mistakes Harriette Cole I m envious that she has sympathy for a co-worker and none for me Harriette Cole I was confused by what I saw on my phone and then my girlfriend confessed Harriette Cole Should I tell my husband why my friend won t visit us My kids are starting to notice and it absolutely breaks my heart For example my mom buys my sister s children much more expensive gifts for birthdays and holidays while my kids get smaller or less thoughtful presents She also often invites my sister s kids out to lunches special outings or shopping trips but rarely includes mine My children have started to ask why grandma doesn t treat them the same and I never know what to say without making my parents look bad I don t want to create a family conflict but I also don t want my kids growing up feeling less loved or less vital than their cousins Part of me wants to sit down and have an honest conversation with my parents about how this favoritism is affecting my family but I m scared it will make things worse Should I confront my parents about this or let it go and find other strategies to reassure my children that they are equally valued and loved Playing Favorites DEAR PLAYING FAVORITES You should speak to your parents and point out your concerns Tell them that your children have noticed that their grandparents do not treat all of the grandchildren the same and their feelings are hurt Ask them to be more mindful of how they treat all the children Be prepared to distract your children from their grandparents favoritism though as you have no control over it DEAR HARRIETTE I ve been working in corporate America in finance for the past six years and while I ve learned a lot and grown professionally I ve inevitably had an entrepreneurial spirit I love the idea of creating something of my own being my own boss and building a business that reflects my passions and values The trouble is that I have no clue where to start I don t know how to come up with a viable business idea figure out funding or confront all the logistics involved in launching a company I m also nervous about leaving the assurance of a steady paycheck and benefits and I worry about failing or making mistakes that could set me back financially At the same time I feel like I ve been putting this dream on hold for too long and I don t want to regret never taking the leap How do I begin exploring entrepreneurship when I have so countless questions and fears What are the first strategies I should take to turn my dream into a reality Dreaming Related Articles Miss Manners It turns out I was too quick with my thank-you note Dear Abby I want these safety issues in our house fixed now not whenever Asking Eric I know it sounds petty but I won t let my sick friend talk to me like this Harriette Cole How can I tell my uncle he s damaging his kid Miss Manners She won t shut up about how fat I am I m months pregnant with her grandchild DEAR DREAMING I want to push back a bit and ask you What exactly is your dream What you describe is a vague desire to have a business In order to be a thriving entrepreneur you need to have a burning desire to do something specific That fire inside then will drive you to figure out all of the details To learn more about entrepreneurship you can take a class or read books that describe what to do You may also want to consider pursuing a hobby volunteering or joining a not-for-profit board something that expands your horizons but also allows you to stay in your corporate job That could be great too Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams You can send questions to askharriette harriettecole com or c o Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO